Funeral wishes and pre-planning your funeral

What pre-planning means

Pre-planning a funeral, in everyday speech a funeral wishes document, is a written plan for your own funeral. It is drawn up calmly, when there is no hurry, and it records how you wish to be buried, what kind of ceremony you want and who you wish to handle the arrangements. The plan is not a legal will and does not dispose of property; it is guidance for your family and for us. Many people make one after the death of a spouse, in connection with a serious illness or simply to spare their children from guessing. The plan lightens the family's load: when the form of burial, the type of ceremony and the grave are already known, no big decisions need to be made in the first days. It also reduces disagreements, because the wishes are in black and white. The plan can be made at any age and changed at any time.

What the law says about your own wishes

Under section 2 of the Funeral Act, the deceased's own conviction and wishes must be respected in burial, cremation and the handling of the ashes. A written plan is the clearest way to show what the wishes were. Section 23 lays down who handles the arrangements: if the deceased explicitly wished a certain person to handle the burial, that person comes first. Otherwise the spouse or cohabiting partner and the closest heirs may handle them, and if none of them does, another close person; in the last resort the home municipality. Disputes are decided by the district court of the home municipality. A contact person named in the plan, for example a friend or one of the children, therefore has the law behind them. The church also respects the deceased's will: a church member is blessed, and a non-member can be blessed if the family requests it, but the deceased's own will about the blessing must be respected. So the plan is worth making also when you do not want a blessing.

What the plan records

The plan can be short or detailed. The most important points are the form of burial, the type of ceremony and the contact person; the other points can be left open or filled in later. We go through the points with you and record only what you have a view on.

• Form of burial: cremation or coffin burial, and where the ashes are placed
• Ceremony: blessing, civil ceremony or none; place and scale
• Music, hymns, readings and who gives speeches
• Flowers, coffin and urn: style, material and colour
• Clothing and any personal items in the coffin
• Grave: family grave, new grave, memorial grove or columbarium; style of memorial
• Memorial gathering: venue, catering and who is invited; wish about the death notice
• Contact persons, instructions for the family and funds set aside for the funeral

Form of burial and placing the ashes

The first question is cremation or coffin burial. In Helsinki more than 80 percent of the deceased are cremated, but both are equally possible, and under the law your own wish decides. If you choose cremation, it is worth also recording where the ashes are to be placed, because the law requires the ashes to be placed permanently in one place within a year and does not allow them to be divided. A Helsinki resident's options are an urn grave 180 euros, a memorial grove or scattering area 90 euros, the Hietaniemi columbarium 300 euros and the urn locker in Kallio church 250 euros for parish members; the placing fee of 150 euros is added to each. Scattering at sea or on your own land is possible with the permission of the owner of the water area or the land. If the family has a grave, record where it is and who holds the grave right. A coffin burial requires a new coffin grave, 690 euros for a Helsinki resident, or space in the family grave. The details are in the guides Cremation in Finland and Choosing a grave in Helsinki.

The ceremony, music and memorial gathering

Record whether you want a church blessing, a civil ceremony or no ceremony at all. A blessing is held in a church, a cemetery chapel or at the grave, lasts about half an hour, and the pastor's service is free of charge; a non-member of the church pays 400 euros on weekdays and 630 euros on Saturdays for the chapels of the Helsinki cemeteries. A civil ceremony can be led by a civil officiant, a relative or a friend, and can be held in a chapel, at the grave or in a rented room. It is worth recording music wishes precisely: hymn numbers, the names of pieces and whether they are performed live or played from a recording. Likewise you can name who gives the memorial speech and who carries the coffin; there are usually six bearers, at least four. For the memorial gathering, record the venue and the style: parish hall, home or restaurant, coffee or a meal. Catering at our partner restaurants starts from 29.90 euros per person. You can also record that no gathering is held or that a family meal takes its place.

Finances: what can be set aside in advance

The pre-plan requires no advance payment, and we do not sell prepaid funerals. Instead the plan can record which funds the funeral is meant to be paid from and what kind of whole you wish for. Funeral costs are paid from the estate's assets, and the bank usually pays funeral invoices from the deceased's account against the invoice; the costs are deductible in the estate inventory. A price range helps with sizing: our packages are Hillitty 1,290 euros, Klassinen 1,790 euros and Harmonia 2,590 euros, and a full funeral typically costs between 2,500 and 5,000 euros; a direct cremation without a ceremony about 1,000 euros in the Helsinki region. The parish union's fees, such as cremation at 260 euros for a Helsinki resident, are added as they are. We note today's prices in the plan for information, but prices are always confirmed at the time of the arrangements. If funds are scarce, the plan can record that social assistance for necessary funeral costs is applied for from the home municipality's social services if needed.

How the free visit works

Pre-planning starts with a conversation, either at our office at Annankatu 12 or at your home if getting about is difficult. The visit is free of charge and commits you to nothing. Our funeral advisor goes through the points with you calmly, explains the options and their prices and answers questions; you can bring a spouse, a child or a friend. Based on the conversation we record your wishes in a clear plan that you read and approve. The plan is kept at our office, and you receive your own copy to give to your family. You can change the plan at any time by calling or visiting, for example when your life situation or the cemetery's situation changes. You can also record your wishes online at your own pace and complete them at the visit. We serve in Finnish, Swedish and English. The office is reached by trams 1, 3 and 6 from the Fredrikinkatu stop about 150 metres away, and there is free courtyard parking with entry from the Uudenmaankatu 17 side.

Tell your family

The plan only helps if your family knows it exists. Tell at least one close person and the contact person named in the plan that the plan has been made and that it is kept at the Armas Borg office. Give them your own copy or tell them where it is at home. It is not wise to keep the plan only in a safe deposit box, because the box is often opened only after the funeral. It is also worth talking about the wishes out loud: then your family understands why you chose, for example, a memorial grove or a civil ceremony, and the choice need not be justified in the midst of grief. If your wishes differ from what your family would assume, for example you do not want a blessing or you want a very small ceremony, the recorded and spoken wish is the one the law says is followed. You can ask us to contact the named contact person once the plan is complete, so they know what to do.

When the time comes

After the death a relative calls us, and we bring out the plan. We go through it with the contact person, confirm that the wishes still stand and begin the arrangements accordingly: the form of burial, the ceremony, the grave, the music and the flowers are already chosen, so the family mainly has to confirm the date and invite the guests. The plan is not locked: if something in it is no longer possible, for example the chosen cemetery is full, we propose the closest equivalent. The family sees the plan, the choices, the prices and the schedule in their shared online space, including those living in another town or abroad. The burial permit, the parish union bookings, the transports and the documents we handle as at any other funeral. The funeral is usually held within 2 to 4 weeks of the death, and the estate inventory must be held within three months; we can handle that too at a fixed price of 590 euros for our funeral clients.

The next step

Pre-planning can begin at any time, and the whole process can be left to us: we ask, record, keep and update. Your only task is to say what you wish, to the extent you want. If a point feels difficult, it is left open and returned to later. The plan costs nothing, does not bind you to a choice of funeral home and requires no advance payment. Call 09 6129 890 or book a planning visit at Annankatu 12; the visit is free of charge. You can also record your wishes online and ask us to get in touch. If you are planning a funeral on someone else's behalf, for example together with an elderly parent, you are welcome to come together; the conversation is often easier to have with an outsider than alone at home.

Frequently asked questions